Talking to others without kids helped me find a future after IVF
The more people I spoke to, the less frightened I felt of my future. I could shift my focus to what I can do because I don't have a kid, instead of what I was missing out on.
Sashi Perera
Sashi Perera is a comedian, writer and former lawyer. She is based in Naarm/Melbourne and is the author of Standstill, a memoir.
Latest by Sashi Perera
After spending months in my country of birth, it no longer feels foreign
Last year, I was horrified to realise that I was a tourist in my country of birth. Large swathes of Sri Lanka felt foreign after my father died. So, after an awful few years, I took a timeout from my Melbourne life and mapped out a four-month travel plan.
My brother and I got matching tattoos on a whim to remember our dad
Last year, my brother Asitha and I got matching tattoos to remember our dad. I couldn't have predicted this barfy bonding moment because we weren't close growing up.
Our newlywed years were grief-filled, so we threw a 'not wedding' party
When my husband and I eloped in 2020, we promised ourselves that we'd have a big party later. After the pandemic, miscarriages and my father's death, it was time to manufacture some joy.
My father died shortly after he retired. It changed my outlook on work
Leaving my day job was the only way to circuit break my life back into balance. Six months later, life is very different.
'Finally time for sadness and rest': Life after stopping IVF
This year, my husband and I decided to stop IVF. Life doesn't look like what we planned but it's so much more than enough.